By brit hutchison

Associate Features Editor

It's teatime at President Byker's house and the Sister to Sister group, an organization for black women, is having itsr annual kickoff. It looks like just a bunch of girls talking about girl things. But something else is going on underneath the surface.

``When I was asked to come, I didn't really know what it was; when I went, I had a good time,'' said first year member Chandra Lochan. ``It gave me some people that I can identify with as a group.''

``We all sat around and introduced one another and talked about things that girls talk about - guys, school,''she said.

But the conversation at the tea party went beyond just talking about guys and school, according to member Pellagia Muliba.

``Getting to know each of the girls as they spoke out and realizing that although we are from different continents, mainly Africa and America, there is a lot about each other that is alike and a lot that is different,'' said Mliba

At the beginning of each year, Sister to Sister, an organization for black women, welcomes new sisters to Calvin, typically with welcome bags and an invitation to tea.

According to Rhae-Ann Booker, Director of Pre-College Programs, who co-leads Sister to Sister with Jacqueline Rhodes, Assistant Dean of Multi-Cultural Affairs, it was a time for the women to break the ice and get to know each other.

``We live these different lives and we are very busy, and although they (African women) are numerically in the minority, these numbers seem even smaller if there is not an intentional effort to connect students,'' sai Booker.

According to Rhae-Ann Booker and Jacqueline Rhodes, who co-lead Sister to Sister now, the program was developed in response to a growing awareness of a tension between International and American students.

``We had students from other countries that were categorizing Americans and vice versa as if everyone is the same,'' said Booker. ``It was an opportunity to move from assumptions and really get to know our black sisters.''

``There was a need to bridge the gap between African American and African women; there were preconceived differences, and once we were able to come together we realized we had more in common than different,'' Rhodes added. ``We are all women and have similar issues regardless of where we are from.''

``At Calvin, where you can count off the number of sisters on campus quite easily, it is understandable that a group like this should be formed to create an alliance and a sense of togetherness as we explore each others' cultures, backgrounds, differences as well as similarities,'' member Pellagia Muliba.

``We were also concerned with the attrition rate (of black women on campus),'' said Booker. ``As staff members and caring people we thought it was our responsibility and calling to provide needed supported.''

Although the program has kept its purpose the same since it began in 1995, there has been a change in the approach it has taken in the last 6 years, according to Rhodes.

``It had a different feel when it originally started. It was more academically based-black women from the area would come in and give career and educational advice, but that didn't seem to be working,'' she said. ``When I came in 6 years ago, we came up with more of a support group with social activities.''

According to Booker, the teatime kickoff is just one of many activities that are focused on encouraging and supporting black women.

``We've done everything from having regular monthly meetings, typically over meals, pairing current students with area alumni, fundraising on campus for spring break service trips, going on getaways, and attending plays and worships services,'' she said.

According to Muliba, getting together is a chance for many of the members to relax and be themselves.

``We always have a riot - when we are together, we are ourselves and we understand each other and the way we are and why we are the way we are,'' said member Pellagia Muliba. ``It's just being there and not having to explain because we all know!''

Some issues that the Sisters deal with, like dating, just come with the territory of being a girl, but they can be exasperated because they are the minority, according to Booker.

``One challenge faced that they never thought would be an issue is dating,'' she said. ``If you are only going to date within your race, the numbers are limited. Many begin to think about dating outside race, something they never considered before.''

According to first year member Chandra Lochan, in an environment where one might tend to feel lonely often, it's nice to have the Sisters around.

``A lot of times you don't say anything to anybody - it's nice to see their faces on campus, it's almost necessary to have someone to relate to,'' she said.

As of this year, AHANA (African, Hispanic, Asian and Native American) males put together a group called Brother's Keeper; the recent development of this group was in response to eagerness of AHANA guys to have a group like the Sister to Sister.

``Year after year, the AHANA men would be like: `why do the Sisters get to do all these activities?' It started out by them being jealous of us,'' said Rhodes. ``We don't have enough African American men so we made it for all men of color.''